EMDR for Overwhelmed Moms: Finding Peace in the Chaos
Feeling like you're drowning in the sea of motherhood? You’re not alone. As an EMDR therapist specializing in helping moms who feel like they’re failing, I see you. You’re juggling a million things—kids, work, home, relationships—and still feeling like you’re not doing enough. Let’s dive into why you feel this way and how EMDR therapy can help you find some much-needed relief.
The Reality of Mom Burnout & Feeling Overwhelmed in the Chaos
The Pressure to Be Perfect
In today's world, the pressure to be a perfect mom is overwhelming. You scroll through social media and see perfectly curated images of other moms seemingly juggling everything with ease. Meanwhile, you’re barely keeping your head above water. It’s easy to feel like you’re not measuring up.
Example: You see a mom posting pictures of her kids' perfectly balanced, lunch box filled with organic snacks and homemade meals, while you’re just trying to make sure your kids have something to eat before rushing out the door. This comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy and guilt.
Too Many Balls in the Air
Between school drop-offs, work deadlines, maintaining a household, and trying to squeeze in a bit of self-care, it's no wonder you feel like you're constantly on the edge. The mental load of managing all these responsibilities can be incredibly taxing.
Example: You’re trying to help your child with their homework while also cooking dinner, answering work emails, and planning for the next day’s activities. The constant multitasking leaves you feeling frazzled and exhausted.
Comparing Yourself to Others
It’s natural to compare yourself to other moms, but it often leads to feeling inadequate. You might see another mom who appears to have it all together and think, “Why can’t I be like her?” This comparison trap can lead to feelings of inadequacy and burnout.
Example: You notice another mom who always seems to be at every school event, has a spotless house, and looks effortlessly put together. Meanwhile, you feel like you’re barely managing to keep your head above water. This can lead to self-doubt and increased stress.
Understanding the Impact of Burnout
Emotional Exhaustion
Burnout isn’t just physical exhaustion; it’s emotional, too. You might find yourself snapping at your kids, feeling overwhelmed by even the smallest tasks, or crying without knowing why. Emotional exhaustion can make it difficult to function day-to-day.
Example: You find yourself losing patience with your children over minor issues, like a spilled drink, and then feeling immense guilt afterward. This cycle of frustration and guilt contributes to your emotional exhaustion.
Loss of Identity
When you’re constantly putting everyone else’s needs before your own, it’s easy to lose sight of who you are. You might feel like you’ve lost your identity outside of being a mom. This loss can contribute to feelings of emptiness and frustration.
Example: You used to enjoy hobbies like reading or painting, but now those activities have fallen by the wayside. You feel like you’ve lost touch with the person you were before becoming a mom.
Physical Mom Burnout Symptoms
Burnout can manifest physically, too. Headaches, stomach issues, and constant fatigue are just a few ways your body might be signaling that it’s time to slow down.
Example: You wake up tired despite having slept through the night. You experience frequent headaches and digestive issues, all of which are signs that your body is under stress.
How EMDR Therapy for Moms Can Help
Reprocessing Negative Beliefs
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is a powerful therapeutic tool that can help you reprocess negative beliefs about yourself. For example, the belief that you’re not doing enough for your family can be traced back to early experiences and societal pressures. EMDR helps to reframe these beliefs, reducing their emotional charge.
Example: A mom who was always told by her parents that she needed to be perfect to be loved might develop a belief that she must do everything perfectly as a mom, that there is no room for error. (When in reality, perfection is a myth and every time we act on that belief, it brings more pain). EMDR can help her reprocess these childhood messages and develop a healthier self-image.
Addressing Root Causes
By identifying and addressing the root causes of your burnout, EMDR can help you understand where these feelings of inadequacy come from. Whether it’s a critical comment from a parent or the pressure to conform to social norms, EMDR helps you process these experiences and move forward so you can live in the present. Oftentimes, the anxiety, overwhelm and rage experienced in motherhood was brewing underneath the whole time. And then once parenting got rolling, a lot of the seeds that were planted in our childhood (perfectionism, low self worth, putting others’ needs first, etc) start poking out of the dirt more than they ever seemed to pre-kid.
Example: A mom who constantly seeks approval from others might realize that this behavior stems from a childhood where her parents only showed affection when she achieved something like an A on a test or winning the game. An EMDR therapist for moms can help her process these memories and reduce her need for external validation.
Building Resilience
Through EMDR therapy, you can build resilience and develop healthier coping strategies. This means that when you face the inevitable challenges of motherhood, you’ll feel more equipped to handle them without reaching the point of burnout.
Example: A mom who feels overwhelmed by daily tasks can learn to manage her stress more effectively through EMDR, developing a stronger sense of self-worth and the ability to set healthy boundaries.
Practical Tips for Reducing Overwhelm
Set Realistic Expectations
Give yourself permission to be imperfect. Set realistic expectations for what you can accomplish in a day. Remember, it’s okay to ask for help and delegate tasks.
Tip: Make a daily to-do list with only the most important tasks (the absolutely must get done today tasks!). Practice acknowledging that while you may not do every task on the list you keep in your phone, you have also done so many other things today that you never give yourself credit for (packing lunches, washing clothes, ordering school supplies- you do these on the regular without even noticing but all of these took time and effort.)
Prioritize Self-Care
Make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine. Even if it’s just a few minutes a day, taking time for yourself can help recharge your batteries and reduce feelings of overwhelm.
Tip: Schedule “me time” into your calendar, just like you would any other important appointment. Use this time to do something you love, whether it’s reading a book, taking a walk, or enjoying a hot bath.
Limit Social Media
Consider reducing your time on social media or following accounts that make you feel inadequate. Surround yourself with positive influences/visuals that remind you that you’re doing a great job (or at least ones that don’t poke at your tender spots!)
Tip: Unfollow or mute accounts that contribute to your stress. Instead, follow accounts that promote realistic and positive messages about motherhood. (I have unfollowed plenty of parenting accounts that no longer served me and my mental health has drastically improved).
Taking the First Step Toward Healing Mom Bournout Symptoms
Feeling overwhelmed and burned out doesn’t have to be your norm. EMDR therapy can help you address the underlying causes of your stress and develop healthier ways to cope. You deserve to feel confident, capable, and at peace in your role as a mom.
With EMDR therapy, you can finally replant your mental garden and watch it flourish with positivity and self-compassion. It's time to break free from the cycle of negativity and embrace the beautiful garden you've always desired. If you’re starting to envision the weeds in your garden and want to get to the root, schedule a free intro call with me to start today!
Reclaim Your Confidence with Therapy for Overwhelmed Moms in Youngstown, Ohio
Feeling like you're constantly falling short in motherhood? You're not alone. At my online counseling practice in Ohio, I specialize in helping moms manage their mental load and reduce stress through EMDR therapy. You deserve to feel confident and at peace in your role as a mom. Let's work together to transform your experience of motherhood. Take the first step towards a more balanced and fulfilling motherhood:
Schedule your free consultation call with a therapist for moms
Begin EMDR therapy to address feelings of inadequacy and burnout
Feel empowered and supported as you reclaim your sense of self
Other Virtual Therapy Services for Moms in Ohio
I also provide EMDR intensives for a variety of concerns such as past trauma, codependency, and anxiety. This also includes support for infertility and birth trauma and grief counseling.
