Therapy for Anxious Moms
Because motherhood is hard but every day doesn’t have to be
You never imagined motherhood like this. Full of worries, to do lists and constantly feeling like you’re coming up short.
Is motherhood supposed to be this hard?
Do you worry that you aren’t enjoying motherhood as much as you thought?
Do you feel overwhelmed, on edge and irritable?
Do you feel guilty for wishing you had more time for yourself (and rarely take it)?
Do you find yourself triggered by your kids not listening, your spouse looking to you for all the answers?
Do you feel like everybody has this mom thing down except you?
You are expected to do so much in a day; you are responsible for the mental load of the house, your kid’s safety and well being, and you start wondering “why can’t I do it all like everybody else?” For anxious moms, it feels like no matter what we do, it’s never enough. There’s always something else on the list that didn’t get done, someone’s expectations to live up to and it all just gets to be too much.
You have moments of joy and fulfillment but you also find yourself mindlessly scrolling or consumed with the future. It feels like there’s always a new stage, something new to research and you’ve been giving every ounce of energy to your child. Motherhood feels hard because it is hard. And that doesn’t mean you have to accept that being a mom equals suffering. You are allowed to thrive, not just survive.
This isn’t what you hoped for
You told yourself you wouldn’t be one of those overprotective moms, or the moms who freak out over every little thing. You never wanted to be a mom who yelled or got irritated at her kids when they were just being kids. This way of parenting isn’t working for you, your kid, or your relationships. You feel burned out, resentful that other moms get time to themselves but you don’t. You feel like a constant failure even though logically you know you’ve been doing the best you can.
Moms who work with me feel like they are losing their mind because they cannot figure out why they aren’t getting everything done but also aren’t having any fun or time for themselves. They want help in feeling more confident, not just as moms, but as people. They want to be able to say “no” and have it stick, they want to spend time on themselves without feeling guilty. They want to stop second guessing themselves and scrolling social media for the magical answer of “how to fix ___”.
You are allowed to love your kids and miss your pre-kid life at the same time.
A more balanced life all around
Taking a break nowadays looks like zoning out for 30 minutes on the couch instead of being able to exercise, see a friend or engage in a hobby you used to love. But you never really feel refreshed. This is common- and fixable! If you believed (in your gut) that you were enough as is, regardless of how many activities you did with your kid, or if the dishes were done, or if your mother in law would approve of your home, what would life be like? A lot of my clients have been waiting for decades to feel confident enough to just be themselves, mess and all.
You’re looking to feel more confident and less worried about being the ‘best’ at everything. Many moms I work with often have a history of perfectionism and high expectations which lead them to feeling like they’re always “on duty”, always working on something. That sense of fulfillment you’re looking for won’t come from doing another task or reading about your kid’s next milestone- it’ll come from within.
Therapy with me looks like identifying the areas that really trigger your anxiety, anger and overwhelm and connecting them to past experiences, memories and beliefs. I help moms be more present so they can enjoy the moment without worrying about the next one. In our work together, we’ll build some daily skills you can use when you feel tense and anxious. We’ll also reprocess those memories and messages that tell you “I’m not enough” so you can engage in the world with a sense of belonging and freedom instead of guilt and anxiety.
You’ve struggled long enough.
How do you work with moms?
I use EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) Therapy to explore and de-charge experiences and memories that have contributed to moms’ negative beliefs about themselves.
Some common negative beliefs I see with my clients:
“I am worthless”
“I have to please everyone/be perfect”
“I am powerless”
“I’m not good enough”
Through identifying memories, negative beliefs and engaging in bilateral stimulation (like self tapping, eye movement, auditory tones), highly charged memories become more tolerable and less triggering, bringing relief from the related symptoms.
Healing is possible. Schedule a free, 30 minute chat today to get started.